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So the LADWP, our benevolent municipal overlords, just announced they’re giving away free... So the LADWP, our benevolent municipal overlords, just announced they’re giving away free solar panels and battery systems. One hundred percent free.
Yeah, I’ll wait while you read that again.
Anytime a utility company, especially one with a monopoly on keeping your lights on, offers you something for "free," you should check for the strings. Because there are always strings. They’re not doing this out of the goodness of their hearts. This ain't some charity bake sale.
Let's be real. This is about them, not you.
Solving Their Crisis With Your Wallet
Translating the PR-Speak
I dug through the press releases, the news blurbs, all the self-congratulatory nonsense they put out. You get gems like this from some director named David Jacot, talking about a thing they call the “solar cliff.” He says, “We really need to start getting more storage online so that we can have that resource when the solar panels aren't generating.”
Let me translate that for you from corporate-ese into English: “We, the utility, have a massive, predictable problem. Our grid is overloaded with solar during the day, but the second the sun dips, we’re screwed. So, we need you to put a giant, expensive battery in your house to solve our problem.”
It’s brilliant, in a deeply cynical way. They’re crowdsourcing grid stability. They’re offloading the burden of building a resilient power infrastructure onto individual households, and they’re using $32 million in state money to make it look like a gift.
And here I am complaining about my internet bill every month. I need to think bigger. Maybe I should convince my neighbors to host my web servers for free to improve "neighborhood data resilience."
It's a bad plan. No, 'bad' doesn't cover it—this is a desperate, last-ditch Hail Mary to patch a grid that’s fundamentally struggling to keep up with the 21st century.
Even a Blind Squirrel Finds a Nut, I Guess
But What If It… Actually Helps?
Okay, let me dial back the rage-o-meter for a second.
A family of four making less than $121,150 a year can get a system worth, what, around $45,000 installed on their roof for nothing. Zero dollars. That’s not just a discount; that’s a winning lottery ticket. In a city where rent eats half your paycheck, eliminating or drastically cutting your electricity bill is a life-altering event. It’s the difference between scraping by and having breathing room.
And in a state where the power grid has all the stability of a Jenga tower in an earthquake, having a battery backup means your fridge stays on during a heatwave. Your AC keeps running. Your kids can still do their homework.
So while the motive behind the program is completely self-serving for the DWP, the outcome for a few lucky families could be genuinely good. Then again, maybe I'm the crazy one for even looking for the silver lining here. It just feels so strange to see a government agency accidentally do something that directly benefits the people it's supposed to serve.
The whole thing is wrapped up in this "Emergency Preparedness" campaign, which is just peak irony. They send out tips like "stay calm," "use flashlights," and "never touch a downed wire." My god, thanks for the advice. I was planning on juggling the live cables. Their whole public message is basically, "Our system is fragile, so it's your personal responsability to deal with it."
It’s just…
Another Bureaucratic Nightmare Disguised as Charity?
The Inevitable Catch
So how do you get this magical free box of electricity? You just call them up, right?
Offcourse not. This is a bureaucracy. You have to find an "approved solar developer" from their special list, and they apply for you. You, the homeowner, are just the venue for this transaction between the state, the utility, and a contractor. You’re the playing field, not the player.
I can only imagine the nightmare. The phone calls, the waiting lists, the fine print. And the money will run out. It's a $32 million pot. At $45k a pop, that’s enough for… what, around 700 homes? In a city of four million people?
It’s a great headline for the mayor, a nice talking point for the DWP, and a potential goldmine for a handful of contractors. For everyone else, it’s just another program that sounds great on paper but will probably be impossible to access. They expect you to navigate this maze, and for what…
And the timing is just perfect. Rooftop solar adoption has been tanking in the city. So, after failing to convince people to buy in, they’re just giving it away to the people who could never afford it in the first place. It’s a solution born of failure. A beautiful, complicated, probably-gonna-be-a-mess solution.
But hey, free is free. If you qualify, you'd be a fool not to try. Just be ready for the headache.
So, It's a PR Stunt That Might Actually Work?
Look, I’m paid to be cynical. It’s my brand. But this whole thing is a fascinating mess. The LADWP is solving its own engineering crisis by dressing it up as social welfare. It’s a band-aid on a bullet wound, but for the few people who get the band-aid, it’s gonna stop the bleeding. It’s a flawed, deeply self-interested program that might, against all odds, do some actual good for a few hundred families before the money disappears and we all go back to worrying about the next blackout.
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